Puppy love, aka a simple infatuation or crush, is often felt by young people in adolescence. Most of us have probably experienced this at some point growing up. And most of us were probably completely “heartbroken” when our little crush didn’t turn into some serious, committed relationship before we even learned how to drive a car.
As I’ve mentioned before, I started writing poetry when I was really young. Recently, I found a lot of my old poems I submitted to a poetry website well over a decade ago.
It’s so amusing to read all of these sad love poems I wrote when I was like 12. Really, Kayla? Love at 12. Hahahaha. You’d swear I had just lost the love of my life when in reality I had never even had my first kiss yet. Talking about being in someone else’s arms or missing their lips on mine when none of these things had EVER happened before. Omg, how ridiculous. I had quite the imagination!!! Maybe too many PG-13 chick flicks?!?!?! I’m going to blame A Walk to Remember, 10 Things I Hate About You, and all those other awesome late 90’s – early 2000’s movies that I spent my weekends watching (OMG the FEEEELS)
Anyway, thought I’d share a couple today. The poems themselves are pretty cheesy but even cheesier realizing a little 12 year old sat at her desk in the afternoons writing these and daydreaming of boys that probably still thought girls had cooties. My mom must have started checking to see if I was sneaking out late at night… or if I was starting to sneak boys in. LOL.
I’m sorry I can’t be perfect, but I’ll try my best anyway
I’m sorry I’m not good enough, will you ever love me someday?
I want to be with you, always and forever
But It’s too late and you don’t want me… ever
I’ll continue to waste my love on you and I’ll continue to hope
And when it’s time to move on, me and grief will cope
I’ll be sad for a long time and I’ll miss you much
But I can’t love you forever if your feelings aren’t such
I’m sorry I’m not good enough and sorry for wasting your time
I’m sorry that I can’t help it… that all I wish is that you were mine
If I had to guess, the person that poem was about probably had NO clue I liked him. I mean.. I’m writing about wasting love on him and wishing he was mine when he was (probably) off playing football and video games and had no clue I existed. I tended to do that a lot when I was little: crush on boys that I had never talked to before lol. Oh and the part “I want to be with you always and forever” hahahaha WOW. Well I surely wasn’t afraid of commitment before even turning into a teenager! WINNING.
Sitting here thinking that there’s an empty space in my bed
And you’re dancing in circles around in my head
Staring at the clock, watching the time go by
It’s been awhile now, yeah it’s been awhile
I’m remembering what it’s like to smile
I’m empty without you here, baby
Oh, life is just not quite the same
You’re to blame, you’re to blame
Wishing on shooting stars and 11:11s
Trying not to cry, please don’t make me cry
I’ll give happiness one more try
But every song… everything reminds me of you
Of us and all the things that we would do
I miss you and it’s hell here when you’re gone
Every second seems too long
You took my heart, you took my smile
Oh boy, it’s been awhile
Okay first off.. it’s been awhile? More like.. never. It’s been never since I had been with anyone. Where the hell did I come up with this romantic shit? Although I do remember any shooting star, 11:11, or dandelion was used for wishing for a boyfriend. Boy crazy, much?!
Well I think it’s safe to say, I probably scared the shit out of almost any guy that I was ever semi interested in by writing poems and having romantic fantasies in my head… and by just being totally creepy. Someone should have told me to worry more about playing with dolls or something. 😉 Hope y’all got a giggle or two out of my silliness!